Sunday, May 20, 2007


Trevor had a campover last night with his aunt and uncle. I looked forward to with dread and with anticipation. On the one hand, my worst case scenario engine was in high gear, and I imagined all sorts of bad things. On the other, I looked forward to him having fun on his own. It turned out fine, though, and he is safely back home.

When the invitation first came through, I knew that Devin would be unhappy about not receiving the same invitation. So, we sorta kept it hush-hush until closer to the actual event. It was probably Wednesday when Trevor first brought it up in the car. Devin knew exactly what was going to happen. Trevor was going to visit his aunt and uncle and Devin was not. He wasn't happy. I was not in a good place as a mom. As the second child in my own family, I knew how this felt, and I didn't want to make it worse. At the same time, I didn't want to make Trevor feel bad by telling Devin how much fun he was going to have with his mom and dad.

Trevor came to my rescue.

He told Devin that he was going to be having a Devin party! And, since it was Trevor's idea, we could talk about this party without Trevor deciding he needed to stay home for the party. Fantastic.

Saturday morning, the day of the campover, Devin woke up at 5, went downstairs and yelled, "MOMMY!" I went to check on him, and he said, "Where is Trevor?" I told him that Trevor was in my bed, and I asked him to come back to bed. I laid down with him, and he said, "Is today my birthday party?" I told him that today was certainly his special Devin party. He was excited, and we talked about a few more minutes, and then he went downstairs demanding juice and toast.

Still, the moment their aunt and uncle pulled into the driveway, Devin's heart seemed to shatter into a million pieces. He cried and cried and cried. He didn't stop crying until they left. Then, he stopped crying pretty quickly. Actually, he recovered faster than I did. I was still sad about his sadness, and he was hitting a ball.

He asked about Trevor a few times, but he was back to his normal self. I really have to remember how fast he recovered and try hard not to project my feelings onto him. He had a good time at the park, at Wildfire, and shopping for packing tape and diapers. He didn't get cake, but he didn't seem to notice.

Trevor did great at his campover, wearing out his dog cousins. He didn't cry to come home at all, he didn't fall into the pond or the bonfire, and he didn't fall down the stairs. Those were all worst case scenarios for me. But, he's a safe kid, and he was well taken care of.

This morning, we picked him up and took the boys to Ikea. We dropped Trevor off at their supervised play place. Devin was OK with not going. He's not allowed because he's not potty trained. I handed Devin off to his dad as quick as I could, but he came right back to me. He patted my back and said, "that's better, mommy. Is that better, mommy?"

Yeah, it's all better.

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